My son frequently has these brilliantly insightful moments that reveal what's been going on in his head all this time you think he's just been thinking about movie reruns or reliving funny jokes he's heard.
This was not one of those moments.
We recently had to sit all 3 kids down to explain to them that we were separating and that we of course love them all very much but that dad was going to be living somewhere else. They seemed to take it really well, with mixed emotions but still. Then this comment:
"It's like redecorating but just in a new place"
Sure. It sounded like a very poetic way of dealing with it. Very mature. He even came over to help me put some of my new IKEA furniture together. Of course a few days later through some other conversations I clued into the fact that he actually thought that I was just living in a new place but that nothing else had changed.
No, I had to explain to him very bluntly, your mom and I aren't going to be married any more.
Oh. Oooooooooooh. And the light bulb went off. And this towering 16 year old gave me a big hug.
The kid is brilliant - a math whiz and can do those 4x4x4 Rubik's cubes in about 1 minute, and like I said he comes up with the most amazing insights about even very complex social issues like bullying or global warming, but subtlety doesn't always work.